The Underpants Bandit

For reasons that lie beyond my understanding, this little stinker loves to raid Matthew's dresser and make off with his underpants. Sometimes she puts them on, other times I just find them lying about the house...seriously about 4 times each day. Whatever floats her little boat...



Here she is modeling the 2010 Incredibles line, fashionably worn over her jammies.

This Time Still Counts

I keep having to remind myself that this time still counts. Even though Jonny is away and it is cold and dark and miserable here (can you tell I really hate winter?) I can't fall into the trap of just making it through each day. I still have to make the best of this time. We watched that movie "Old Dogs" with John Travolta, Robin Williams, and Kelly Preston right before Jonny left. While it is pretty cheesy, it really was funny in some parts. Kelly Preston's character is getting sent to jail for 2 weeks and she says her motto is, "Don't serve the time, let the time serve you." I heard that and thought "That's it - that's my motto too."

I tried really hard to do that at first. I made a goal to read 2 books a month, which I realize is by no means a lofty goal. But it is more than I had been reading. I have read some great new books and some old favorites - Gone With the Wind (Scarlett's adulterous obsession with Ashley makes me madder than ever now but I still love the book on account of the history involved and Margaret Mitchell's unmatched imagery)and The Count of Monte Cristo.

I joined a gym. Would you believe me if I told you I had never before gone to a gym in my entire life? It is true. But a girl whose husband deployed a couple of years ago told me that going to a gym with childcare saved her sanity. So I thought I would give it a whirl. My sanity is still hanging by a thin thread, but I am in better shape. I even paid a personal trainer for three sessions to teach me how to use some of the equipment because I have no idea how. It helped, but I still don't know how to use at least half of the things there. They all look very big and dangerous to me, but it's not so much that that I am afraid of. I just feel like an idiot. You know, walking up to a machine, reading the little diagram and instructions on what you are supposed to do. So I watch what other people do and then after watching 27 or so people on a machine I go over to it and try to look like I know what I am doing. I know. I am nerdy.

The best thing BY FAR that I have done since Jonny left is train for and run a half marathon. One of the girls whose husband is with Jonny organized some of us and I committed to do it. I was scared, because I ran one when I was 22 and it pretty much kicked my trash, and here I am eleven years older doing it again? I know. Nerdy and crazy. But it was incredible. It was the Halloween Half. It started in Provo Canyon just up past Sundance and we ran down the canyon the whole time. The weather was perfect, the scenery was amazing, and who can believe it but I felt better this time around than I did last time! And did I mention we ran it in costume?





During the last mile I was really starting to hit a wall when I heard my cell phone ringing. When I answered it was my darling Jonny calling me from clear across the world. He told me how much he loved me and how proud he was of me and it made me cry (not good when already gasping for breath) and really helped me finish up strong. I love him. Like crazy.

This really was a personal victory for me. While I was pregnant with Sophie I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. Things were really bad. It was while Jonny was away and my hands were so swollen and painful that I couldn't even dress the kids. So my Mom or my sister would dress them for me. I ended up at the ER twice with migraines because the joints in my neck would swell and I couldn't take much of anything to relieve the pain because I was pregnant so I'd just sit there crying and vomiting until I gave up and went to the ER. Sometimes I couldn't chew because the joints in my jaw would swell so much that my teeth wouldn't meet up. Nothing they gave me to treat the arthritis worked - even what they described as the "holy grail" of treatment for RA. It was a pretty depressing time for me. The doctor wanted to try one more medicine but I couldn't nurse Sophie while I was taking it. It was hard to decide not to nurse her when I was able, but he told me I really didn't have a choice. Fortunately that medicine has worked and I am able to control things pretty well.

So deciding to run this was a big deal because I really didn't know how my body would react. I really think it was a blessing from the Lord. I just prayed and prayed that I would be able to do it - I felt like it was something that I had to do, and my joints felt better than they have felt in years. I would go out on 10 and 11 mile runs and feel great after wards. It was amazing. And then ever since the race I feel like a 33 year old stuck in an 80 year old's body once again. But I am so thankful that the Lord let me have that time to feel so good. It was really exhilarating.

The problem I'm having is now that the race is past and winter has set in and my body hurts I just want to sit around and let the kids watch TV all day, which is clearly not acceptable. I need some new goals or something but I feel too overwhelmed by life right now to even want to set new goals. What to do?! I know! Maybe I should sit alone at night and write rambling, tangential blog posts and bore other people to tears!

I'm going now. To try and pull myself together.

And the Award Goes to...Me.

We all joke about our not-so-great mothering moments...our "Mom of the Year Awards."

I'm just here to tell you I win.

Today I was giving Matthew and Sophie a snack of raisins and fish crackers when I looked up at the clock and realized I needed to leave ASAP to get Matthew to preschool on time. My mom was going to be home and she said I could put Sophie down for a nap and leave her here while I took Matthew to school and ran some errands.

So I'm running around giving commands..."Matthew, put your shoes on! Where is your backpack? Do you have your show-and-tell thing?" I'm not usually so unprepared, but the time just kind of flew by. Of course as I pick Sophie up to put her in bed I realize she is poopy. So I lay her down on my bed to change her and an errant raisin went flying so I picked it up and popped it in her mouth and proceeded to change her diaper.

All of the sudden I noticed she was making an "Eww, gross" face and pushing the raisin out of her mouth.

A sudden fear took hold of me. "It couldn't be..." I thought. So I plucked the raisin out of her mouth and smelled it. Sure enough, it was poop. Not a raisin. Poop! What to do next?! I grabbed a wipe and started wiping out her mouth. She began to gag and couldn't tell if it was because I was wiping too far back or because I just fed her her own poop. Then I offered her some water, all the while thinking, "You're going to need something a lot stronger than water to get rid of that poop taste in your mouth..." Then I brushed her teeth a couple of times and then washed her toothbrush in hot water and soap. Somehow that still didn't seem like enough.

So there you have it. Unless you have ever fed your child their own poop, I win.

The DOC

The DOC is the Diabetes Online Community and it has been such a great resource to me. I have 'met' so many other parents of kids with diabetes and they are amazing. One of my favorite blogs to read is Miss Meri's. She has four children, and three of them have diabetes. Her life is insane as she tries to manage it all! She wrote a great post today. If you have any interest in reading it, she blogs at ourdiabeticlife.blogspot.com

If you have a second or two, would you please say a little prayer for my cute Jonny? The poor boy got a kidney stone more than three weeks ago. He is all alone so far away and called me in so much pain. He was transferred the next day to a place with a better medical facility. They basically told him to take some pain meds and come back in two weeks if he didn't pass it. He didn't pass it and when they did a CT scan it hadn't moved at all.
He was then transferred to another place with a urologist. The Dr. went in (do you know where they 'go in' through? Yuck.)and he could not get to the stone to laser it. So they put a stint in and are waiting another week to go back in and see if they can get it.
I am always amazed at how strong mentally Jonny is - he just deals with whatever comes very stoically, but he is starting to feel a little down from being in pain so long. I told him that I can complain about child birth all I want, but I can never say it has lasted four weeks! So if you could send any thoughts and prayers his way we would appreciate it!

Sophie the Strong

She likes to get in a good workout first thing in the morning. You know, start the day off right...

Pumpkin Patch

There is a darling little old man near here who grows pumpkins each year and sells them from his front yard. He must make a killing - every time we drive by that place is hopping. The kids have been dying to go get some so we ventured over the other day. They were giddy and still want to go out on the front porch every morning to inspect the pumpkins and "make sure the bad guys didn't take them." Matthew calls them "ponekins." Please bless he never learns to say it the right way. OK, maybe not never, but at least not for a couple of years... Matthew told me, "Now we need to put a fire in them and give them a happy face!"





Please note: It was crazy hair day at school. Matthew's hair is not always so...big.








Happy Halloween!

Good Times in Kindergarten

Emma came home from school the other day and told me, "Mom. I have to tell you the MOST DISGUSTING thing that happened at school today." I asked her what it was and she said, "Well, ummmm, I'm too nervous to tell you."

For the next 15 minutes she hemmed and hawed while I asked her questions like, "Did someone barf everywhere? Did someone poop in their pants (any time you want to make my kids laugh hysterically, just tell some kind of poop joke and you've got 'em. Classy, I know). Did someone pick their nose and wipe it on the floor? (because Matthew had just done that the very same morning...)

Finally she gave in and said, "Well. This boy at school tried to KISS ME!!" I started laughing my head off. She could not understand why I was laughing, but that is good fun right there. Then she told me that he did pick his nose and wipe it on his shirt. I told her that was disgusting and the kissing part was just funny, but she was not amused.

Rock the Walk !

Today was our JDRF "Rock the Walk" to raise money and awareness for Juvenile Diabetes Research. Thank you SO MUCH to those who donated money and came to the walk and were so supportive! We had a great time! And I am so glad it is over. For reasons I am not really sure of, the preparation for it really stressed me out. It was fun to see the carb counts of the food posted for all to see - no SWAGing (Scientific Wild A__ Guess) needed! We also saw a couple of kids on the side of the path getting a BG check and it was so nice to not be the only ones doing these things for once!

Honorable mentions go to my sister-in-law, Sachele, who is due to give birth in two weeks and came on the walk with us. Also to my friend, Wendy, who is 5 months pregnant and hosting a big birthday party for her cute daughter, Olivia (pictured with Emma below)later today! It was a good thing I had my sunglasses with me today because I teared up the second we arrived and continued pretty much the rest of the time we were there...







These guys really got into the theme...rock the walk.


Emma riding in the stroller after a BG of 57...so much walking and jumping in a bounce house will do that to a girl! Note the Starburst on the tray in front of her...those suckers are a low blood glucose dream: individually wrapped and a tidy 4 grams of carbs each.


Hair painting...

Walk to Cure Diabetes

After Emma was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes last year, I was not in a good place. I was sleep deprived due to the new baby, frazzled and overwhelmed by all the details required for Emma's care, and going it alone as Jonny was away constantly that summer for work. I was also haunted by my Grandpa's death due to complications of Type 1 Diabetes and wondered if that was what was eventually in store for my sweet baby girl.

So when the somewhat overly perky representative from the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation called me and tried to get me involved in the Walk to Cure Diabetes - I'll be honest here - I kind of wanted to tell her to shove it. I briefly told her that my husband was away and I had a brand new baby and didn't think I could do it. She kept explaining and encouraging...and then my phone died and I thought "Praise the Lord!" and also thought that maybe I should call her back and let her know that I hadn't intentionally cut her off but I really didn't want to talk to her anymore so I just let it go.

Naturally she called me again this year to try to get me involved and once again, the timing is not ideal. We just moved, Jonny is away for his long trip, it takes all my energy to make it through the day without adding anything to my life! I was about to tell her no, but she explained there was a luncheon we could go to and learn more about the walk. I went and I took Emma and about five minutes into the luncheon and I knew that no matter what we were doing the walk - because Emma wanted to. She loved being around other kids with diabetes and hearing people talk about diabetes and hearing them talk about finding a cure.

A cure. I don't let my mind wander in the realm of a cure very often. Because I am a big believer in making the best of today and the situation the way it is now. But when I do think about the day that they find a cure for Type 1 Diabetes, I start to cry. I think about putting my daughter to bed at night without worrying that I will find her dead in the bed the next morning because her blood sugar has dropped too low during the night. I think about not making her bleed 8 times a day or more so that I can check her blood sugar and not giving her 5 shots a day. About not setting an alarm for 2:30am every night to check her blood sugar and not shoving M&M's in her mouth for her to chew while she sleeps when I find her blood sugar is too low. I think about letting her go and play at a friend's house without having a panic attack the entire time she is away because I know that her blood sugar can drop amazingly fast. And not worrying that every case of strep throat or a stomach bug will land her in the ER again. And not leaving a note for a babysitter that says, "If Emma has a seizure or passes out, just call 911 and then call me."

A cure for Emma would mean FREEDOM. Freedom from pain and constant worry and future complications from diabetes.

So here is my shameless plug. I am asking each of you to donate what you can to help find a cure for diabetes. If you can give $1, or $5, or $10 - whatever you can do, I would be so grateful. I told Jonny the other day, "I am not really comfortable begging our friends and family for money." But a moment later told him, "But it's for our little Emma, so I'll get over it."

There are three ways you can help make a difference for Emma.
1. You can join our walk team, known as Team Emma (I know, I am original right?), which consists of family and friends who walk with us to show support for Emma. Register online at: walk.jrdf.org
2. You can make credit card donations to support our team via the above link. Or, you can send our family a tax deductible donation in any amount, made payable to JDRF. We will deliver any donations in Emma's honor to the local JDRF office.
3. Contact others in your circle of family and friends to donate as well. Just get in touch with us and we can send you a pledge form. If you choose to raise donations yourself, you may forward this letter or write one of your own.

You can donate money to JDRF with the confidence of knowing that a full 80% of all donations received goes directly to research.

And know that we will be forever grateful to you for it.


Elmtree Photography


DID YOU KNOW? Sugar is not the enemy. Some of the most common misconceptions about Type 1 Diabetes revolve around sugar.

Type 1 Diabetes is not caused or related in any way to sugar consumption. Type 1 Diabetes is an autoimmune disease - your body turns against itself. It attacks the insulin producing cells in the pancreas and destroys them. Emma was at particularly high risk for developing diabetes as my paternal grandfather and my maternal uncle both have it.

Even after diagnosis, sugar is safe for diabetics. Well, as safe as it is for anyone. In the past, diabetics' sugar intake was very restricted. Now diabetes is managed by accounting for carbohydrates. Because a bowl of pasta can raise your blood sugar just as much or more than a candy bar. Each person with diabetes has what is called an insulin:carb ratio. For so many grams of carbs you get so much insulin.


Whenever I tell people about the care that is required to keep Emma's diabetes in check, they are surprised at how involved it is. To give you an understanding of what it is like for Emma, here you have it
A Day in the Life of Miss Emma's Diabetes Care.....

Emma's day begins at 2:30am when I stab her in the finger in the dark (sounds like a Dr. Seuss book, except for the stabbing part. That is a little dark for Dr. Seuss). If her blood sugar is good, I stumble back to bed and try to go back to sleep. If it is too low I fish around under her jammies for her pump, which is strapped to her body 24/7. Except for when I take it off for a bath or a site change (and those can be dangerous, take it from me) and she tells me most every time, "I'm free!"

But, I digress...If her blood sugar is a little too low, I turn her pump down or off. If it is a lot too low I feed her M&Ms. She doesn't even really wake up - just chews and swallows and then I shove more in. She then has to swish some water around in her mouth per the dentist's request because clearly I am not going to make her brush her teeth at 2 in the morning.

When she wakes up in the morning we do another BG (blood glucose/sugar) check (#2). Once she determines what she wants to eat we count the carbs in what she is eating and give her a dose of insulin. For the first year she had diabetes we were doing insulin injections and she would get two at breakfast and one every other time she ate...usually about 5-6 shots a day. Now that she is pumping insulin it is much easier and I just push some buttons and she gets her morning insulin.

If you ever need to know the carb count on anything, just ask me. It's all in there in my brain. Taking up room that I need but now do not have. The part of my brain that reminds me to close my car door after I exit or to blow candles out when I will be gone for the next five hours. Important things that I should remember but no longer do because all the room in my brain is now taken up with the amount of carbs in food. And the amount of time it takes insulin to start working and how long it takes the insulin to peak and how long until it stops working all together...you get the picture.

10:30am Another BG check (#3), mid morning snack,carb counting, and another dose of insulin.

Noon BG check (#4), lunch, carb counting, and another dose of insulin.

3:30pm You guessed it, BG check (#5)mid afternoon snack. It's always chocolate milk while she watches her post nap cartoons. So 8 oz. of milk has 12 grams of carbs and 1/2 tsp. of Nesquick has 3 grams of carbs for a grand total of 15 grams of carbs and 1/2 unit of insulin. And can you imagine how neurotic I feel telling my friend who is babysitting Emma that she can have chocolate milk if she is hungry and then asking her to make it with those precise measurements so as not to make her BG too high?

5:30pm BG check (#6) dinner, carb counting, and another dose of insulin.

8pm Bedtime. BG check (#7). At bedtime she either gets food if she's too low, or insulin if she's too high. Sometimes she's just right. At night she needs to be a little higher than during the day because it is so dangerous for them to have low blood sugar at night. Some people wake up when they are getting low and some people don't.

Some people go to sleep and never wake up because their blood sugar drops too low - it is called Dead in the Bed Syndrome and two teenagers have died from it this year already. I think it is probably the greatest fear of all parents of diabetic children.

Whenever I go to bed I check her one more time (#8). And then I am off to bed. Until my alarm goes off at 2:30am and the whole thing starts all over again...


Blood sugar check #342,962


Fridge full of insulin


Normal blood sugar is 70-130. At diagnosis Emma's was 578. Our goal for her is to be between 100-200. While it is higher than normal, it is safer for her growth and development for her to be a little too high than a little too low. She starts feeling funny when her BG gets below 90.



Bins full of diabetes supplies

One of THOSE Days

I know that I have a greater purpose in life than cleaning up other people's bodily fluids.

It just doesn't feel like it.

Because:

This morning Matthew peed all over the floor, and then said quietly, "I peed."

This afternoon the cat barfed all over the couch.

And this afternoon we changed Emma's pump site and when we took the old one out it just kept bleeding and bleeding. Through a bandaid, through her underbooksies...

And so it goes.

Mr. Pickles

Elmtree photography


Matthew walked around all day today saying, "I am Mister Pickles," in his best imitation of an English high society voice. I have no idea where he got that from, but it cracked me up.

Mr. Pickles turned three last month. He is pretty much potty trained, but would rather just go in his diaper than stop playing. He would rather do just about anything than stop playing. We went to Texas to see my sister last month and he didn't eat more than a few bites at a time for two days because he was so excited by all the new toys that he couldn't be bothered to eat.

He is usually the first child awake and snuggles in my bed with me while I try to wake up. He is passionate about all cars, but especially "Cars" cars. Most every week he asks me if he can wear his Batman jammies to church and is so disappointed when I say no. Party pooper, I know.

He wouldn't talk to his Dad for a week when he left. Every time I would try to talk him into it..."Daddy misses you. Please talk to him," he would shake his head and say, "No. He leaved me. He really really leaved me." Sad. And "really really." Sometimes he tells me, "Mommy? I just really really." And that's it. He just really really.

He is the sweetest child ever when he is sweet - smiling and saying, "Thank you Mom!" when I wipe his poopy bottom - and the most rotten child ever when he is rotten. A child of extremes for sure.

Family Pictures

One of my college roommates, Emily, and her sister, Melanie, took pictures of our family before Jonny left. They are so talented and were great to work with! Sophie and Matthew were sick that day and they just rolled with it and still got some great shots. Already these pictures mean so much to me and the kids absolutely love to look at them when they are missing their daddy. I highly recommend them, so if you live in the area and need pictures look them up at elmtreephotography.blogspot.com. Matthew is a bit of a boob guy already and kept caressing Melanie's chest. Sorry Mel!

Signs of the Times

Signs that my husband has been gone a little too long (already) and the reality of the coming year is setting in:

The Cranky Factor: I apologize to my kids for yelling at them at least 4 times a day. I still, however, continue to yell at them for the tiniest infraction or lack thereof.

Short Fuse: If you know what is good for you, you will do what I tell you to do when I tell you to do it. Otherwise, you will be subject to even more of The Cranky Factor.

Excessive Dessert Eating: If it has sugar in it and it is in a 10 foot radius of me, it will end up in my mouth.

Extreme Laziness: Instead of my usual go-getter attitude and desire to stay busy and keep my house clean and things in order, I turn into Stop-talking-to-me-I'm-trying-to-read-a-book-get-your-own-food mom.

Cartoons-R-Us: None of this 30 min. in the morning and 30 min. post nap cartoon watching. You want to watch an hour and a half of cartoons in the morning and two hours after your nap? Fine by me. Just don't bother me. I'm too busy eating and reading my book. OK?

Don't worry. It's just a phase. I'll be back to being your overly protective uptight mom before you know it.

This One

This little lady keeps me in stitches. She is still a really good-natured baby, but she definitely knows what she likes and doesn't like and has no problem letting me know about it!

She doesn't like crawling on the grass...




And she loves her bath. Enough to dive (make that: lean so far she loses her balance and falls) in fully clothed while Emma is taking her bath.

At least this time I'm not knocked up....

I'm a little MIA these days. Naturally, Jonny has been away, because when is he really here? (Does that sound bitter? I might be a little bit bitter.)And now he is home but works crazy hours and we are lucky to see him for a few minutes each day. I am proud of him and his hard work! The kids have been having a really hard time though. I can tell they just never know if he is going to be here or gone and they cry for him a lot and that breaks my heart.

So in addition to managing the household and the munchkins I am trying to pack up for our big move which is just about 8 days away. By myself. Our last couple of moves were completely handled by a moving company and I am thinking that is definitely the way to go! However, since this one is just across town we are doing it ourselves. It kind of pains me to think of how many piddling little loads I've driven across town to my parent's house. Certainly not the most efficient, but it's what I can do right now!

My sweet parents. I am worried about adding more gray hairs to their heads as we descend upon them once again. They are empty nesters and here I come with my three little wild animals! How great are they for always taking us in? But, as the title declares, at least I'm not knocked up this time!

The first time Jonny left for training Emma was one and I was pregnant with Matthew. We still had our house but I stayed with my parents until we moved to California. Then when we moved back from California and Jonny left for training again Emma was 3, Matthew was 1 and I was pregnant with Sophie. I swear my parents' neighbors must think Jonny is some kind of dirtbag...gets me pregnant and runs away every time! =)

Hopefully we'll be settled in happily in a couple of weeks and hopefully I will not be as crazy as I have in times past as my cute parents will be there to lend a hand and hopefully help fill some of the void for my little ones while Jonny is away.

Hope.

The word of the day...

San Diego Zoo

We had a dreamy time at the San Diego Zoo. Jonny's parents and brother's family met up with us there and it was so fun! The weather was perfect and it really is an amazing zoo. They do, however, deserve the ranking of "super crappy" in the food category. Really expensive (which is to be expected) but also really bad food. We are talking microwaved frozen taquitos here. Don't mess with me and my food...














Matthew loved the gorillas and after we saw them he started walking around like a gorilla and was actually spot on in his imitation...almost eerily so.









Our own little monkeys...



Matthew and Emma chased this peacock all over the place calling him "Azul"...one of the characters in Emma's favorite Barbie movie.